I never thought in a million years I’d be talking about aging nor looking in the mirror at myself aging. For most of my life, I thought youth was something I could hold on to: like time was a loyal friend that would always wait for me. HA! Should have listened to my granny when she would say: Wait until You Get Older. I did not understand that phrase at all then but I do now.
Long story short, I chased feeling young, looking young, staying young. It felt like the forever phase that no one could touch.
But here I am, in a season where aging no longer feels like loss: it feels like knowing and finding understanding. Like finally seeing life for what it’s been trying to teach me all along. There’s an untalked about side of aging that no one prepared us for. The part that’s less about wrinkles or slowing down, and more about waking up to joy, to peace, to the moments that matter the most.
Somewhere along the way, I realized youth isn’t just about smooth skin or fast days. It’s about spirit, It’s about curiosity, laughter, creativity, and gratitude, all the things that make life feel full. The truth is, I spent so much of my younger years in a rush and honestly I still cant see what I was rushing towards.
In my younger years, I was rushing to succeed, to prove something, to perfect something all the time. Now I’m learning how to slow down long enough to enjoy what I worked so hard for.
And that’s the part no one talks about that happiness changes, it shifts from needing excitement to craving ease.
It starts showing up in the smallest places: in the quiet of a morning wake-up or walk, in the coffee you didn’t reheat three times, in the phone call you actually took your time to make. Aging has taught me that joy isn’t hiding, it's just waiting for me to stop chasing everything else. #realtalk
As a Black woman, this feels even more sacred, because for so long, we were told to be strong, to carry it all, to keep moving. But strength without joy is survival and not living. I want to live. I want to laugh again without rushing to the next responsibility. I want to love harder without waiting for the right time. I want to dream like I still have time: because I do.
So now, I’m choosing to show up differently, not as someone afraid of getting older, but as someone curious about what’s next. There’s beauty in knowing you don’t have to compete with your past self. You just have to honor her and keep going.
If you’re reading this, maybe you’re feeling that shift too. Maybe you’re tired of rushing happiness, tired of thinking joy has an age limit. I’m here to tell you, it doesn’t. You’re not too late. Darling, you’re right on time.
The untalked side of aging isn’t loss. It’s arrival. It’s finally showing up for the life you almost forgot to enjoy.
Drop a love in the comments or your thoughts. Until next time keep aging with grace
Xo, Tangie Bell
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